Breastfeeding Support, Formula, and the Real Postpartum Feeding Experience

postpartum therapy supportperinatal mental healthpregnancy mental healthcouples and coparentinganxiety and intrusive thoughts

Aug 11

Written By Dana Levandoski

Black and white close-up image of a baby drinking from a bottle while gently holding the caregiver’s hand, capturing the tenderness of feeding moments.

August is National Breastfeeding Month, a time to celebrate the beauty, strength, and complexity of feeding your baby. But let’s be honest, breastfeeding isn’t always easy, and for many families, it’s not the whole story.

For some, nursing comes naturally. For others, it’s filled with cracked nipples, weighted feeds, triple feeds, or tears, yours or the baby’s (probably both). It might mean power pumping around the clock, supplementing with formula, or making the tough decision to stop nursing altogether. Whatever your experience looks like, it’s valid, and worth honoring.

Breastfeeding Is Beautiful. And It Can Be Really, Really Hard.

Even for those who’ve breastfed before, each feeding journey can bring new challenges. Maybe your baby has a tongue or lip tie. Maybe they’re not gaining weight as expected. Maybe you’re navigating triple feeds (nurse, pump, bottle) while also recovering from birth or managing a NICU stay.

And for many, that “natural” thing everyone talks about ends up feeling anything but.

Here are just a few of the hurdles that can come up during the breastfeeding journey:

Tongue and lip ties
Latch difficulties
Low milk supply
Overproduction and clogged ducts
Mastitis
Painful letdowns
NICU stays and pumping schedules
Slow weight gain or medical concerns
Mental health impacts, including postpartum anxiety and OCD

Those are just the physical considerations. Then there is the emotional toll of it all. The pressure and comparisons. The “Breast is Best” messaging that can feel so heavy when it’s just not working. The discomfort of nursing in public or in front of your dad, your brother, or a stranger at a restaurant. Even deciding how long to nurse can feel like walking a tightrope between pride and guilt.

Let’s Talk About Pumping

If you’re pumping (whether exclusively or to supplement), you know it’s not the easy way out, it’s its own full-time job.

Finding the right flange size (and realizing the standard one rarely fits)
The stress of pumping enough for daycare or tomorrow’s feed
Washing parts, storing milk, labeling bags, and remembering what’s from when
Hooking yourself up to a machine while your baby cries in the background
Managing work breaks and privacy, especially when pumping outside the home

Pumping can be empowering and exhausting. If you’ve ever cried over spilled milk, literally or figuratively, you’re not alone.

Support Makes All the Difference

Breastfeeding is not a one-person job, even if you're the only one lactating. Non-birthing partners play a huge role. Whether it’s bringing the baby from the crib at 2am, changing diapers, washing bottles or pump parts, or offering a word of encouragement during a hard feeding session, your presence matters.

Access to support matters too. Every family should have access to affordable, judgment-free help. That might look like:

A free or low-cost group clinic
Telehealth consultations with lactation consultant, or with one who visits your home
Feeding support groups in your community
A trusted pediatrician who helps you advocate for what’s best for your baby

Because sometimes, the most helpful thing a provider can say is: “You're doing a great job. Let’s figure out what works best for you and your baby.”

Fed Is Best. Period.

Whether you’re exclusively nursing, exclusively pumping, combo feeding, or using formula from day one, you are feeding your baby. You are meeting their needs. You are showing up. And that’s what matters.

So this National Breastfeeding Month, I’m honoring all of it:

🍼 The nursing sessions and the bottle feeds

🕓 The midnight pump alarms and the 4am formula prep

❤️ The tears, the pride, the grief, the joy, and the fierce love behind it all

You’re not alone. And you’re doing it right.

If you’re looking for support…

I’m a perinatal therapist based in California, offering virtual and in-person therapy for parents navigating the postpartum period, feeding challenges, identity shifts, and the many emotions that come with early parenthood. Learn more about working with me here.

If You’re Looking for Lactation Help in Sonoma County...

I highly recommend Better Beginnings. They provide lactation consultations, classes, and postpartum support with an emphasis on compassionate, personalized care. They also offer:

In-home or virtual visits